Light.

Light glorifies everything. It transforms and ennobles the most commonplace and ordinary subjects. The object is nothing, light is everything.

Leonard Missone

LOVE these! I love learning in my passion!

Flickers of Hope

This week has been good. Me and Scott have been doing much better. I'm getting a little more hopeful every day. Our counselor suggested we write a list of our "Landmines" and talk about it. We must have talked for hours today. No fighting, just talking. He was so sweet. Held my hand and kissed my cheek. There is a reason I fell so hard for him in the first place, and I'm starting to understand why that was again. He is so caring and dedicated and willing to work on anything and everything he needs to.
It is going to be okay. I see that.
God has a plan and sometimes I forget he does. All hope is not lost.

And she loves him. She loves him oh-so-much. :)

Hurting.

I don't think he realizes how much I'm hurting right now.

I cry.

I scream.

I hide the truth from my little girl.

We're trying to work on things. He complains, I don't say anything, we fight. 

I hide in my room and smile for her, laugh for her, play with her.

But when she's asleep it all comes out. 

She goes in her swing and I go into the shower and let it all out. 

I stay in there sometimes for hours while she's sleeping.

Just crying.

Sitting on the shower floor with my head in my knees, crying.

It doesn't go away, it lingers.

I feel like this constantly, every day.

We're doing better but I'm feeling worse.

I feel like I'm going down...

down...

down...

and I'm not getting better.

Nothing is helping.

I don't think anything will.

At least she doesn't see it. And he doesn't notice. 

Homemade Baby Food!

I tried something new today and I'm very pleased with the outcome. Homemade avocado baby food. Organic and has no coloring, additives, or preservatives. Completely fresh and healthy. I've made a step-by-step for how I did it in case anyone wants it!

Makes almost a week's worth of fresh avocado.

And the Final Product:

Sorry I haven't posted in a while, super busy but will resume soon!